On God and Mammon

The news dropped yesterday, that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is sitting on an excess of 100 billion U.S. dollars.  A good synopsis of the issue can be found on Forbes.

Regardless of the legal status of the issue, I'd like to voice a few opinions and push back gently on the apologists of the church - at least on a couple of points.

My Contextual Background

It's always good to go back my in my mind and articulate what I had expected the church was doing with members' tithing and donations.  My expectations were based on what I was taught all my life - by my church teachers, my parents and the leaders in General Conference and church magazines.

From infancy, til about the year 2012, my understanding of how the church operated was:

• members give 10% in tithing donations; the 10% is based on their income before any expenses, including taxes.  Later, after the year 2001, I learned there could be some nuances about paying on gross or net taxes.
• members are encouraged to give a generous fast offering as well as contribute to other funds for the temple, or missionary work, etc.
• tithing was used to operate the church - pay for the electricity, print manuals, ward Christmas parties, youth program trips and activities ... all of that.
• fast offerings and other donations went specifically to feeding the poor or to the initiative for which the donations were intended.
• tithing funds were kept separate from other donations such as fast offerings.
• furthermore, it was my understanding that whenever our leaders said that we (the collective church) didn't have any paid clergy, I assumed that the church didn't pay any of the leaders who were responsible for leading and teaching the gospel.  The only people who would've been paid were Church Education System leaders at Institutes and who were full-time seminary teachers.  I didn't think any bishop, stake president, area authority or general authority got paid anything.  It was my understanding, that the people called as general authorities were in such a financial position as to be able to live the Law of Consecration and they gave all that they earned and lived on (including their retirement funds) to the church in order preach full-time; not unlike how full-time missionaries do.  Or at the very least, if they didn't consecrate all that they had, they had enough personal funds to serve the church full-time.

Then City Creek Mall happened - around 2012.

That is when I really began to learn how the church operated its finances.  I learned that mission presidents and general authorities are compensated (call it a salary or stipend, they receive something in exchange for their time; and they keep their personal retirement funds and incomes).

I learned the the president of the church is actually a corporate sole and in 1923, the church ceased being a normal church congregation and was incorporated into a corporate sole.

I learned that the church always publicly disclosed what they took in and and how that money was used.  But in 1959, that practice of transparency ceased.

And then back to the topic of the mall - although the church disputed the fact that tithing money was used to pay for the mall, it appears that was not the case.  It would appear that excess tithing funds (what was left after operating expenses) were used for investing.  That money then was used to help pay for the mall as well as to financially bail out Beneficial Life Insurance company.

As a member who was taught to pay the church before all other expenses (including utilities, food, clothing, etc), learning that those donations were being used as seed money for investing and then for a billion dollar mall, rubbed me the wrong way.

Another thing happened in 2012.  The church changed the verbiage on its tithing slips.

It would seem that funds were kept separate before this change, but after the change, it was pretty clear there wasn't any anxiety about keeping tithing funds separate from fast offerings and other types of donations.  Therefore, tracking a dollar paid by a primary child or a widow, to ensure it didn't get mixed with funds that would pay for a mall, would probably be more difficult.  I've seen enough corporate accounting to know how very messy "tracking a dollar" gets, with convoluted managerial accounting practices.

What Jesus Taught

When I felt this dissonance, I turned to the Savior to understand what he might think of all this.

Matthew 6:24

No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.

Luke 16:13

No servant can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.

Matthew 16:19-21

Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:

But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:

For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

Matthew 19:20-23

The young man saith unto him, All these things have I kept from my youth up: what lack I yet?

Jesus said unto him, If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come and follow me.

But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful: for he had great possessions.

Then said Jesus unto his disciples, Verily I say unto you, That a rich man shall hardly enter into the kingdom of heaven.

Mark 10:20-25

And he answered and said unto him, Master, all these have I observed from my youth.

Then Jesus beholding him loved him, and said unto him, One thing thou lackest: go thy way, sell whatsoever thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come, take up the cross, and follow me.

And he was sad at that saying, and went away grieved: for he had great possessions.

And Jesus looked round about, and saith unto his disciples, How hardly shall they that have riches enter into the kingdom of God!

And the disciples were astonished at his words. But Jesus answereth again, and saith unto them, Children, how hard is it for them that trust in riches to enter into the kingdom of God!

It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.

John 2:14-16

And found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money sitting:

And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers’ money, and overthrew the tables;

And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father’s house an house of merchandise.

When I read these passages and think about them, it seems very evident to me that Jesus had an extreme disdain for mixing the Good News and money.

And when he commanded his disciples to continue to preach and establish the kingdom of heaven on earth, he counseled them to have faith and not worry and plan how they would live, eat, drink or how to dress.

Matthew 6:25

Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?

Also, having witnessed dozens of other churches focus on wealth, I developed a strong disdain for any church leader in any church that focused on money.  And when I saw the church I belonged to, do the same thing, it caused further dissonance.

How Much Money and Capital Does The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints Have?

This is a question many have wondered since 1959.  Because the church ceased being transparent, many often wondered just how much money they must have to be able to afford to buy land and build monuments to God in the form of temples, and adorn those temples with $17,000 rugs.  How much must it have if it can purchase and own 2% of the land in Florida?

In the last 20 or so years, many have speculated.  The estimates have been in the $20-30 billion range.  But it would seem, thanks to the whistle-blower, that, at a minimum, in its Ensign Peak Advisers arm alone, it manages $100 billion.

Two Members' and Apologists' Arguments and my Gentle Rebuttals

First: Pressure to Tithe and Donate

One of the bulwarks of scriptures for tithing is Malachi 3:8-10.  As a missionary, I cited this scripture every time I taught investigators the principle of tithing.

Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings.

Ye are cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, even this whole nation.

Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.

Years later, I learned the correct context of this scripture.  In fact, it says it in the scripture itself that the Lord is talking to his priests - his leaders.  The priests were supposed to tithe the donations they received from "members."  The Lord accuses of them robbing Him and "this whole nation" (i.e. the "members" or Israelites).

In my opinion, this scripture should not be used to "shake down" the members and make them feel guilty for not paying tithing.

Ironically, it would appear the church's leaders have again been greedy and instead of relieving burdens, they are a burden on members.

There was a time in the church's history, where it strove to not be a burden on members.  James Talmage taught that members should not have to pay tithing if their expenses were more than their income!

Also, in 1907, Joseph F. Smith said (source),

I want to say another thing to you, and I do so by way of congratulation, and that is, that we have, by the blessing of the Lord and the faithfulness of the Saints in paying their tithing, been able to pay off our bonded indebtedness. Today the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints owes not a dollar that it cannot pay at once. At last we are in a position that we can pay as we go. We do not have to borrow any more, and we won’t have to if the Latter-day Saints continue to live their religion and observe this law of tithing. It is the law of revenue to the Church.

Furthermore, I want to say to you, we may not be able to reach it right away, but we expect to see the day when we will not have to ask you for one dollar of donation for any purpose, except that which you volunteer to give of your own accord, because we will have tithes sufficient in the storehouse of the Lord to pay everything that is needful for the advancement of the kingdom of God. … That is the true policy, the true purpose of the Lord in the management of the affairs of His Church.

Second: Talents

The other scripture often cited the last few days, has been the Parable of the Talents.  One argument I've heard often is that the church is a good steward of the money the members give it and they are expected to "grow it".

Take the time to read it and understand the context Jesus shared the parable.

Matthew 25:14-30 - The Parable of the Talents

14 For the kingdom of heaven is as a man travelling into a far country, who called his own servants, and delivered unto them his goods.

15 And unto one he agave five talents, to another two, and to another one; to every man according to his several ability; and straightway took his journey.

16 Then he that had received the five talents went and traded with the same, and made them other five talents.

17 And likewise he that had received two, he also gained other two.

18 But he that had received one went and digged in the earth, and hid his lord’s money.

19 After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them.

20 And so he that had received five talents came and brought other five talents, saying, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me five talents: behold, I have gained beside them five talents more.

21 His lord said unto him, Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.

22 He also that had received two talents came and said, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me two talents: behold, I have gained two other talents beside them.

23 His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.

24 Then he which had received the one talent came and said, Lord, I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not strawed:

25 And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo, there thou hast that is thine.

26 His lord answered and said unto him, Thou wicked and slothful servant, thou knewest that I reap where I sowed not, and gather where I have not strawed:

27 Thou oughtest therefore to have put my money to the exchangers, and then at my coming I should have received mine own with usury.

28 Take therefore the talent from him, and give it unto him which hath ten talents.

29 For unto every one that hath shall be given, and he shall have abundance: but from him that hath not shall be taken away even that which he hath.

30 And cast ye the unprofitable servant into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

Things to note about this parable.

The parable is about individual preparation for the Second Coming of Jesus.  In a sense, the talent represents doctrine and commandments given.  What we do with what we've been taught is the basis of judgement.

But members and apologists use the parable in a literal sense.  They view the talents as actual money the church receives in donations from members.  So, if this were the case, the man/lord in the parable would actually represent the members who give money to the church.  In the parable, when the man/lord returns, what does he do?  He reckons with them.  He wants to know what they did with his money.  He wants transparency.

So if the members and apologists for the church want to use this parable to defend the $100 billion, then there should be a reckoning - an accounting of where the money comes from and how it is being used.  There must be transparency.  But members have not had that since 1959.  They are told, essentially, "trust us; we have Arthur Anderson auditing us."  We simply don't know if the money is being used morally or not.  We will never know if the church is like Joel Osteen, Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker, the Scientologists or not.

Conclusion

In my opinion, for proper justice in this situation, I would want the following to happen:

1. The church needs to return to a full, detailed position of transparency for all dollars received and all dollars used; in all its financial and capital interests.  Let this work be above the table, in the light of day.
2. The church needs to make a strong case for why it needs so much money.  They need to justify their actions with the teachings of Christ - in particular with the scriptures cited above.  Personally, I'm not convinced Jesus would endorse this kind of behavior.
3. If indeed, the church does not need continued donations because they've been excellent stewards, then they should relieve more burdens from members and switch to a purely voluntary donation stance, rather than an absolute 10% of income donation.

As a bonus idea:

Allow church members to "let their light shine" by using the funds to make the world a much better place.  Assuming members think the work the church is doing is good for the world, perhaps they could grant project money to wards, stakes and areas to improve the area in which they live: open local food banks, expand peanut butter factories, open affordable clothes-line stores - in all geographical areas of the world.

All of the above doesn't preclude the church from continuing its investing arm.  With a fraction of the $100 billion, they could continue to invest and grow funds.

I sincerely hope the church and any organization, would always be a light on a hill; a light that is not hidden under a bush.  As we approach the year 2020, I would hope we all would support and strive for greater clarity and transparency.

Flooding and Prayer

My faith in God continues to grow stronger the more I humbly realize how little control I have over things and events.

There was a time when I believed that this equation was the best way to navigate life:
1. keep all the commandments
2. pray; thank God for my blessings
3. pray; ask God for blessings
4. if I stay obedient, I will receive the blessings I asked for

When I received blessings, in my mind, it was because God found me worthy and granted my requests when I asked him in prayer.

And when I didn't receive blessings I had asked for, it was because I was not worthy or it was because God had some other reason - perhaps there was something He wanted me to learn by not granting me what I had asked for.

My understanding of prayer has evolved over the years.  My perspective on prayer has gone from a "Christmas wish-list" concept and ask for many, many things, to one where I only ask for one thing, every single time.

If you are of the mindset of having a list of things to ask of God; anything from asking for help in finding your lost keys to asking God to cure a loved one who has cancer; then I would contend your prayers are answered maybe about 50% of the time.  You probably feel blessed when you receive what you asked for and you probably scratch your head and ask yourself "Is it I?" when you do not receive what you ask God for.

But what if I were to tell you there is a way to have 100% of your prayers answered, would you be interested?  I'll tell you further below how this is possible.  But first, we need to observe the world and universe.

In this first story, ask yourself if what Irene Corbett prayed for was righteous?  Was she worthy?  And lastly, why was she not saved.  And what about the missionaries?  Why were they spared and not she?

In the second story, which is a personal one, we learn of full-time missionaries serving in Guatemala.  They relayed their experience to me about how they were taught, constantly in Zone Conferences and one-on-one interviews with the Mission President, that if they strictly obeyed the rules, they would find people to teach and have success in baptizing souls.  They obeyed precisely; got up at 6am on the dot, and did everything by the book.  But their success the Mission President promised, was not realized.

The last story has to deal with the Houston Temple.  In 2015 and 2016, the Houston area saw heavy rains in May and April respectively.  The 2015 flooding was know as the Memorial Day flood and the 2016 flooding was known as the Tax Day floods.  Many members recounted stories of the temple being saved from the 2015 and 2016 floods and how it was a miracle.  But then August 2017 and Hurricane Harvey happened and the temple was flooded.  What did this mean?  Did God pass judgement on the Houston members?  Some members thought so, and they went so far as to say members were negligent in using the temple, so God took it away from them.  No one talked much about the temple flooding, but there were lots of positive stories of people travelling to Dallas and San Antonio to attend the temple in those cities.

Now back to my point about having 100% of your prayers answered.  There is only one thing you should pray for: to be content with God's will, no matter what happens.  Jesus taught this when he taught his disciples how to pray.

Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread; and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

We are to simply ask to have our will be aligned with God's.  It is God's will for us to live as long as He wants us to live and it is God's will that we live a life of virtue (forgive others, live with courage, justice, wisdom and temperance).

We are not to ask God to save our life or to protect it before we get on a boat.  We are not to ask for specific success in baptizing people.  We are not to ask that a building be saved from the elements.  All of these events are ultimately out of our control and are only known to God.  So instead of trying to change the will of God (events that happen in the world and universe), we ought to ask to be content and accepting of God's will - no matter what happens.  If you do this, and you do the work to be content with whatever happens and to be positive and happy (entirely within your power), then your prayers will be answered all the time.

To be clearer, let me cite a couple of Stoic philosophers:

Epictetus said, "Don't ask for things to happen as you would like them to, but wish them to happen as they actually do, and you will be all right." (Encheiridion 8)

Marcus Aurelius said of prayer, "A prayer of the Athenian people:
Rain, rain, dear Zeus: rain on the cornfields and the plains of Athens.
Prayer should be thus simple and open, or not at all." (Meditations 5.7).

Marcus also wrote, "Universe, your harmony is my harmony: nothing in your good time is too early or too late for me. Nature, all that your seasons bring is fruit to me: all comes from you, exists in you, returns to you." (Meditations 4.23)

If you pray simply, and if you align your desires to the will of God and His universal, cosmic, domain and all the events that happen therein, you will want exactly what God wants!  And what more could you possibly want than what God wants?  What God wants is good!

And so, this week, after spending three hours navigating the flooded roads in the sheets of rain on my commute home; and after watching the weather forecasts of more projected rain and knowing that our home flooded a year and a half ago; and knowing full well that our home could flood again - my sincerest prayer was not for God to protect my family and home from harm, but rather a prayer of "thy will be done."  Make no mistake about it - I want my family and home and possessions to be protected, but what I want more is to have my will be aligned with God's.  And so I'm not going to presume to ask or tell God how to do His job.  Rather, as a child, I ask Him to help me be content and to even love His will - no matter what.

If God wants me to be sick or to have cancer, then I want that too.

If God wants me to be wealthy and healthy, then I want that too.

If God wants my wife or children back, then I want that too.

If God wants me to flood (again), then I want that too.

I want what God wants.

Now, does that mean I sit back and don't act?  No!  I have my free will and I act within my span of control.  God granted me and everyone else, the ability to think and reason and act.  But as for events out of my control - that is the domain of God and I only want what He wants.

Reversal on Wayward Children?

If you have been a Mormon for the last 30 to 40 years, you may already know that the topic of rescuing a prodigal child is a recurring teaching and has been since the beginning of Mormonism.

The following passage from a Boyd K. Packer talk, is one I'm quite familiar with.  It has brought my parents, and thousands of other parents, comfort and a perception of control over their children's salvation.

It is not uncommon for responsible parents to lose one of their children, for a time, to influences over which they have no control. They agonize over rebellious sons or daughters. They are puzzled over why they are so helpless when they have tried so hard to do what they should.

It is my conviction that those wicked influences one day will be overruled.

“The Prophet Joseph Smith declared—and he never taught a more comforting doctrine—that the eternal sealings of faithful parents and the divine promises made to them for valiant service in the Cause of Truth, would save not only themselves, but likewise their posterity. Though some of the sheep may wander, the eye of the Shepherd is upon them, and sooner or later they will feel the tentacles of Divine Providence reaching out after them and drawing them back to the fold. Either in this life or the life to come, they will return. They will have to pay their debt to justice; they will suffer for their sins; and may tread a thorny path; but if it leads them at last, like the penitent Prodigal, to a loving and forgiving father’s heart and home, the painful experience will not have been in vain. Pray for your careless and disobedient children; hold on to them with your faith. Hope on, trust on, till you see the salvation of God.” (Orson F. Whitney, in Conference Report, Apr. 1929, p. 110.)

We cannot overemphasize the value of temple marriage, the binding ties of the sealing ordinance, and the standards of worthiness required of them. When parents keep the covenants they have made at the altar of the temple, their children will be forever bound to them. President Brigham Young said:

“Let the father and mother, who are members of this Church and Kingdom, take a righteous course, and strive with all their might never to do a wrong, but to do good all their lives; if they have one child or one hundred children, if they conduct themselves towards them as they should, binding them to the Lord by their faith and prayers, I care not where those children go, they are bound up to their parents by an everlasting tie, and no power of earth or hell can separate them from their parents in eternity; they will return again to the fountain from whence they sprang.” (Joseph Fielding Smith, Doctrines of Salvation, comp. Bruce R. McConkie, 3 vols., 2:90–91.)

Packer goes on to discuss repentance, but it is un-mistakable, in this doctrine, that there is a path to heaven for wayward children ... a path that will ensure both parents and child live together in the after-life.

But, with the newest Latter-day prophet, has this doctrine been reversed?  Russell M. Nelson said, yesterday, April 7, 2019:

The anguish of my heart is that many people whom I love, whom I admire and respect, decline his invitation. They ignore the pleadings of Jesus Christ when he beckons, “Come, follow me.” I understand why God weeps; I also weep for such friends and relatives. They’re wonderful men and women, devoted to their family and civic responsibilities. They give generously of their time, energy, and resources – and the world is better for their efforts. But they have chosen not to make covenants with God. They have not received the ordinances that will exalt them with their families and bind them together forever.

How I wish I could visit with them and invite them to seriously consider the enabling laws of the lord. I’ve wondered what I could possibly say so that they would feel how much the savior loves them, and know how much I love them, and come to recognize how covenant-keeping women and men can receive a fullness of joy.

They need to understand that while there is a place for them hereafter, with wonderful men and women who also chose not to make covenants with God, that is not the place where families will be reunited and be given the privilege to live and progress forever. That is not the kingdom where they will experience the fullness of joy, of never-ending progression and happiness. Those consummate blessings can come only by living in an exalted celestial realm, with God our eternal father, his son Jesus Christ, and our wonderful, worthy, and qualified family members.

The above passage seems to be talking only of people who never are baptized Mormon.  But the last part of the above paragraph, and later in his talk, he makes it clear that he is including those "who have distanced [themselves] from the church" which would include prodigal children.

My belief is that God and Justice and Mercy are perfectly aligned; and that the only thing we truly have control over is how well we live the first and second great commandments.  If we truly obey those commandments through our life, then we can stand fully prepared before the judgement bar of God.

I simply cannot believe that God would deny people like Mother Teresa and many other great people, entrance into heaven over a technicality such as baptism and temple work.  If God is all-powerful and controls the judgement bar; and given the Mormon doctrine of proxy ordinance work, it seems very reasonable God could ensure a technicality were met in order to allow a person entrance into heaven, thereby allowing mercy her space, while ensuring men and women are granted the opportunity to learn through works (justice), which is what is most important in life.

Revelations and Revelation-Reversals

Today's announcement reversing the "November 2015" policy is the latest in a long-line of examples of God's spokesmen mis-speaking.  One of these three conclusions must be true:

Either,

1. God is waffling in the management of doctrine or policies or
2. His spokesmen are are often mistaken or confused in the revelatory process or 
3. Those claiming to be His spokesmen really aren't His spokesmen.

In any case, it makes me wonder why we need a middle-man, especially when large swaths of members knew (and said so) the original "November 2015" policy was incorrect.  It's hard for many members to place confidence in men who are seemingly no different than other men who don't claim to be the only living prophets authorized on earth to speak for God.  And furthermore, how do individual members know the real, true will of God?  Was the "November 2015" policy the true will of God, or is the reversal of that policy in April 2019 the true will of God?

When President Nelson said the following, it left little room for members to doubt the gravity of the revelation.  The language was 1978-esque.

"This prophetic process was followed in 2012 with the change in minimum age for missionaries and again with the recent additions to the Church’s handbook, consequent to the legalization of same-sex marriage in some countries. Filled with compassion for all, and especially for the children, we wrestled at length to understand the Lord’s will in this matter. Ever mindful of God’s plan of salvation and of His hope for eternal life for each of His children, we considered countless permutations and combinations of possible scenarios that could arise. We met repeatedly in the temple in fasting and prayer and sought further direction and inspiration. And then, when the Lord inspired His prophet, President Thomas S. Monson, to declare the mind of the Lord and the will of the Lord, each of us during that sacred moment felt a spiritual confirmation. It was our privilege as Apostles to sustain what had been revealed to President Monson. Revelation from the Lord to His servants is a sacred process, and so is your privilege of receiving personal revelation." emphasis added; Russell M. Nelson, Becoming True Millennials, January 10, 2016

Today's announcement, too, uses similar language in emphasizing discussion, thought and prayer.

“These policy changes come after an extended period of counseling with our brethren in the Quorum the Twelve Apostles after fervent, united prayer to understand the will of the Lord,” wrote President Russell M. Nelson and his counselors in the First Presidency, President Oaks and President Henry B. Eyring, in the statement. (source)

The Church's announcement today is not only a reversal of the "November 2015" policy, but it also revises its policy with regard to how it deals with homosexual and lesbian members - they will no longer be considered apostates.

While Church leaders still consider a same-gender marriage by a member to be a serious transgression, it will not be treated as apostasy for purposes of Church discipline. Instead the “immoral conduct in heterosexual and homosexual relationship will be treated in the same way,” Dallin H. Oaks said.

This is yet another example why the Church is not trustworthy - this compass is unreliable.  Please don't mis-understand me; I'm supportive of the changes the Church leadership made today.  It's not enough, but at least it's moving in the right direction.

There were those who knew the resting-state of will of the Lord before the living prophets, with regard polygamy, allowing all members access to the priesthood and temple and other controversial doctrines and practices.  Thankfully, some had courage to agitate the leaders to change.  Members of our generation have similarly had the courage to agitate for change when it comes to LGBTQ issues.  When thousands resigned in 2015 and 2016, after the "November 2015" policy was issued, a clear message was sent to the leadership, leading in the culmination of today's revelation.  We all have a part.  It's just a bit unfortunate that the pace is slow, and some leaders have to demonize those are who agitating for change - who are simply doing the will of the Lord.

On Primary Questions and People Seeking Answers to Them

Elder Corbridge asks all to seek answers for the primary questions
1. Is there is a God?
2. Is Jesus the Savior of the world?
3. Was Joseph Smith a prophet?
4. Is the LDS church the kingdom of God on earth?



Some people who sought and found answers to the primary questions:

On Members Saying That I'm Following Satan

I've discussed this in a previous blog post, but some people in our community have continued to verbally say that my family is being lead by Satan.

Some of what I write below, I've said before.  Some of what I write below is additional food for thought.

What does it mean when someone is under Satan's influence or being lead by Satan?

If I were to walk in the door of all the local Christian churches, sit down and tell the pastor about myself and be completely honest with him or her, I would be willing to bet they would say I'm not being influenced by Satan.

For me, if someone is being influenced by Satan, it means they are immoral.  Immoral, to me, means:

• committing murder; attempting to commit murder; war-mongering; genocide
• stealing, robbing, tax-evading, swindling, bilking
• cheating on a spouse; wrecking families; committing adultery
• being abusive; physically, sexually or psychologically
• lying, not being honest or truthful; intending to deceive; cheating
• embracing, supporting or giving cover to any behavior above, when you are in a position to stop or prevent it, within reason
• embracing vice; being corrupt, foolish, selfish, prideful, slothful, licentious or acting cowardly
• lacking any virtue; such as justice, wisdom, courage or temperance

I'm not perfect, but I don't have any habits of any of the above.  We all may have lied or have dabbled in vices at some point, but for me, none of those vices have turned into a habit and therefore is not part of my character.  I don't think I'm being influenced by Satan.  In fact, my striving has always been, and continues to be to:

• support life; mine, my family, those who benefit from my charitable contributions and taxes
• live honestly, in work and personal life; try to be transparent as reason permits
• being faithful to my wife and children; I've never physically abused them and I have tried to parent productively, without emotionally abusing them ... anyone can ask them how I've done and I won't be fearful of the answer
• I try to ensure justice is pursued where I can influence it; if someone has committed a crime or done something morally wrong, I try to help them or if needed, report it to the police/authorities
• I strive to live a life of virtue every day; I'm not 100% successful all the time, but I am striving to be more just, more wise, more courageous and more temperate

I think it should go without saying, but I will make it explicit.  I do not worship Satan.  I do not participate in black magic, voodoo, Satanic rituals or anything of that kind.

Now, to a member of the Church, what they mean when they tell me I'm being influenced by Satan, is that I won't believe or say that Joseph Smith was called of God or that the Mormon church is the one true church on the earth today and all other religions are an abomination before God or that the current prophets, seers and revelators of the Mormon church are the only men who speak for God on the earth today.  Because of that "thought crime" people believe and verbally say I'm being influenced by Satan.

What confounds me, though, is that there is plenty of evidence Joseph often stepped into immoral behavior as listed above.  Some members will try to ignore it or rationalize it.  This is moral relativism.  It wasn't moral in 1835, it isn't moral in 2019.  If we are going to give Brother Joseph a break, then I would suggest to anyone who thinks I'm being influenced by Satan, to give me a break too.  If Joseph passes the judgement bar, I think I will too.

Also, at the heart of this issue, for me, is trust.  I believed my leaders and teachers.  I trusted them to tell me the truth.  I believed my leaders and teachers when they said the peep stone was an anti-Mormon fabrication designed to make us lose our faith.  I believed them when they said that Joseph practicing polygamy was false and an anti-Mormon lie or that he made up the Book of Abraham.  I believed them when they said it was God who cursed wicked people with black skin.

When I later learned the truth, I realized my leaders and teachers, either wittingly or unwittingly, didn't tell me the truth.  That hurts and I lost trust in them.  How can I have faith in leaders where there is no trust?

In my search to understand why people are saying my family and I are under the influence of Satan, I came across this conference talk by James Faust: The Great Imitator.  One passage stood out to me.  I share this passage to those who think or say I'm following Satan.

Let us not become so intense in our zeal to do good by winning arguments or by our pure intention in disputing doctrine that we go beyond good sense and manners, thereby promoting contention, or say and do imprudent things, invoke cynicism, or ridicule with flippancy. In this manner, our good motives become so misdirected that we lose friends and, even more serious, we come under the influence of the devil. I recently heard in a special place, “Your criticism may be worse than the conduct you are trying to correct.”

I do not have any bad or ill feelings towards people who say this of me or my family.  My deepest desire is that they would take the time to understand what I've been through - to walk in my shoes - to ask questions and get to know me, then to exercise empathy.  If we have to agree to disagree, so be it.  But please make the effort to know me before you judge me so harshly and say that I and my family are following Satan.  We simply are not.

CFM - January 7 to 13

Reading: Matthew 1; Luke 1

First Impressions

Fear

People are subject to fear.  Fear of loss; fear of the unknown; fear of uncertainty; fear of pain.

The angels that visited Mary, Joseph and Zechariah told them not to fear.  This is a message we all ought to repeat to ourselves.  To me, the first Great Commandment means that we are content with our fate and lot in life.  And to truly embrace the First Great commandment, we ought to also love our fate and lot in life.  This set of circumstances; these turn of events were meant for us.  The quicker we accept that fate and lot, the better off we are and we show God we love what He has given us.

No word from God will ever fail / virgin birth

This is a fascinating subject and I think a proper analysis will help dispel myths and help people have a proper balance between reality and faith.

In the KJV version, Luke 1:37 reads, "With God, nothing shall be impossible."  While in the NIV version, it reads, "No word from God will ever fail."

If anything is proclaimed that seems amazing or miraculous, we ought to go to great lengths to ensure it came from God.  We all know that humans are subject to being deceived and can deceive others.  This is the reason for scientific analysis; to detect when people are telling the truth or not.  Now, with Mary and the virgin birth - this truly is an extraordinary claim.  But not out of the realm of impossibility.  It is known, in the animal kingdom, that some animals can reproduce asexually.  It has never been proven with humans, but at least according to this article about a study, about 1% of the population claims to have had a virgin birth.

And this puts observers in an interesting spot.  Someone makes an amazing claim and they say it comes from God - how are we supposed to take this?  How are we, as individuals, going to ensure that this claim came from God or from the imagination of this other person?

For me personally, I will reserve judgement for myself.  I've seen and heard too many outlandish claims, from Scientologists, to Muslims to radical Christians to turn over my judgement and agree with their claims.  So, where do I fall with the virgin birth?  No where.  I'm not sure it really matters.

I think we all ought to be careful in thinking that if we ask God with enough faith, that He will give us a blessing.  I think too many people put a lot of hope in this scripture when they try to apply it to themselves.  They desire "blessing X" and they think that "with God, nothing is impossible" and they pray for it, but they don't receive it.  They then begin to blame themselves for not being worthy, or not having enough faith.

To people with this mindset, I would recommend that they check their desires.  The only thing they really have control over is their attitude.  All else is out of their control; their health, wealth, weather they will have a child or be child-less ... all of that is out of their control.  And if they extend their desires to one or all of those things, and they fail to get it, they may blame God!  And what a sad place to be in!  Rather, with all these things, they ought not to extend a desire toward them, and if they do, they should have a reserve clause: if it is according to God's will.

Some Questions from the Manual

Why did the Savior need to be born of a mortal mother and an immortal Father?


President Russell M. Nelson explained that the Atonement of Jesus Christ “required a personal sacrifice by an immortal being not subject to death. Yet He must die and take up His own body again. The Savior was the only one who could accomplish this. From His mother He inherited power to die. From His Father He obtained power over death” (“Constancy amid Change,” Ensign, Nov. 1993, 34).

I will be very honest and open here; why does the Atonement require a sacrifice by an immortal being?  This is one of those things that seems to fall under the category of some great mystery; pointing to some law in the Universe that we are unaware of.  And we've just been told; that's the way it is.  And a follow-up "meta" question here.  Why are we humans OK with some assumptions as this one, but we deny other similar assumptions by other non-Christian religions?  Anyway, not sure this really matters anyway.

One final thought on this subject; the word "sacrifice" in President Nelson's quote.  To me, the word sacrifice means the one doing the sacrificing loses something in return for something greater.  I think some examples are in order.

In chess, if I sacrifice my queen for a knight or rook, but win the game with that sacrifice, then mission accomplished!  I don't want to lose my queen, but my goal of winning the game is bigger than my fear of losing the queen.

For the kids to love Harry Potter, we learn of the many sacrifices people make through the books.  One stands out in my mind, when Dumbledore and Harry seek out a horcrux at a cave.  To gain entrance to the cave, Dumbledore has to cut his hand in a form of self-sacrifice and self-harm.  Later in the cave, he drinks poisonous water that inhibits him, so that he can gain access to the horcrux.  They accomplish the mission, but as we later find out, the horcrux was a fake, so mission not accomplished.  And this brings another aspect of what a sacrifice is: uncertainty.  It's one thing to "make a sacrifice" when you are guaranteed an outcome (i.e. sacrificing queen for a win in a chess game), but it is quite another when the odds are less than 100% or even less than 50%.

In my career, if I sacrifice time with family, in order to earn more money, so that I can then have more time off work to spend with my family, then mission accomplished!  But sometimes these sacrifices can be long and the work might change and I may find myself away from my family.

If my child needs an organ transplant to live, and I supply that organ and in the process die, then the sacrifice was worth it if my child lives.  But there is the factor of uncertainly, that I may die or worse, my child dies.

All of these thoughts fall under the science of risk management.  People have studied this time and time again.  Life is full of decisions and trade-offs.  We are willing to take risks, so long as we are somewhat confident in the outcome.

Now, back to Christ's sacrifice.  If He knew with certainly he was the Son of God, and therefore immortal, then it would seem that His sacrifice is more analogous with a queen sacrifice in a chess game, for a certain win.  He was perfectly willing to suffer and die, because He knew he was going to live again just three days after dying.  And not only just live again, but be immortal.

But what if He didn't know for sure he was the Son of God?  What if there were some degree of uncertainly on His part?  We certainly get this vibe when we analyze the temptations of Christ in the wilderness.  If He were uncertain about his mortality, then that makes this a higher-risk sacrifice.

God’s blessings come in His own time

Indeed they do!  It is we humans who put too much desire in things out of our control.  If we are anxious about getting a blessing, we are putting ourselves at risk of violating the First Great commandment.  Better to be in a position to love your fate from God, than to extend your desire for something out of your control.  If you love your fate, then you will love what God sends your way on His timetable, and you will never be anxious.

We see lots of anxiety in Mary, Joseph, Elizabeth and Zechariah.

The faithful willingly submit to God’s will

The CFM manual says, "Like Mary, we sometimes find that God’s plans for our life are quite different from what we had planned."

Speaking from experience, I've learned that God's plan for me is very different from many others in my family and community.  For some, it is to remain a faithful member of one congregation or church, while for me, God has lead me on a different path.  I submit my will to God and I try to accept His will for me every single day.  I used to have lots of anxiety, thinking I could plan and control my fate and plan.  But I've learned, painfully sometimes, that I can't control it.  I have to accept God's will for me.  Accepting God's will is at the heart of the First Great commandment.

Qs&As and Reactions to Some Things That Have Been Said To Me

Who is your leader now?
I still consider God and Christ my leader; always have.

Who is your leader on this earth?  Are you following Denver Snuffer?
No one.  I now worship God through no medium.  No, I am not following Denver Snuffer or any of the leaders of the dozens and dozens of branches or splinter groups of Mormonism that exist today and have existed since Joseph Smith died.

Are you joining another church / religion?
No; one was enough.

Do you still believe in God and Jesus Christ?
Yes, any minimal investigation of my blog here, will indicate the devotion I've had and still have to Christ.

Have You Studied "Come, Follow Me"?
I have been studying and teaching from "Come, Follow Me" longer than most members.  I started studying and teaching from this manual since it was rolled out to the youth in 2013-2014 or so.  I have studied and taught from it the last 4 years while I taught the 15 and 16 year-olds.  Honestly, I wish it taught more about Jesus and less about, unique, LDS-specific doctrine.  Feel free to look at all my lessons on this blog.

Satan is influencing you!
Maybe I should take the high-road on this, but maybe it's worth while to talk about this a bit.

What do we mean by Satan's influence?  If I were to walk in the door of all the local Christian churches, sit down and tell the pastor about myself and be completely honest with him or her, I would be willing to bet they would say I'm not being influenced by Satan.

For me, if someone is being influenced by Satan, it means they are immoral.  Immoral, to me, means:

• lying, not being honest or truthful; intending to deceive; cheating
• stealing, robbing, tax-evading, swindling, bilking
• cheating on a spouse; wrecking families
• lacking any virtue; such as justice, wisdom, courage or temperance
• embracing vice; all the opposites of the above; being corrupt, foolish, selfish, prideful, slothful, licentious or acting cowardly
• being abusive; physically, sexually or psychologically
• embracing, supporting or giving cover to any behavior above, when you are in a position to stop or prevent it, within reason

I'm not perfect, but I don't have any habits of any of the above.  I don't think I'm being influenced by Satan.

Now, to a member of the Church, what they mean when they tell me I'm being influenced by Satan, is that I won't believe or say that Joseph Smith was called of God.  And here is the kicker ... there is plenty of evidence Joseph often stepped into immoral behavior as listed above.  Some members will try to ignore it or rationalize it.  This is moral relativism.  It wasn't moral in 1835, it isn't moral in 2019.  If we are going to give Brother Joseph a break, then I would suggest to anyone who thinks I'm being influenced by Satan, to give me a break too.  If Joseph passes the judgement bar, I think I will too.

We love you no matter what!
Thank you!  This is a wonderful response!  I love you too!

We often get so distracted by all this stuff that upsets people.  It did upset me, but not anymore.  I have simply let it go.  When I let go of all those issues, I felt profound peace.  I have been more content and less depressed and less anxious.  I have had more empathy for people, I’ve been more kind and much less judgmental.  Jill is my witness in all of this.  For people we are close with ... meaning we interact with on a daily and weekly basis, they too have noticed the change in my demeanor.  So all of that comes from simply letting it go and not putting it on a shelf and ignoring it.   I choose to simply focus on my relationships; with God, Jill, my family and my community, insofar as those relationships are respectful and kind.  I will always show love and respect to everyone and I hope I get it in return.

And I have to share one response - the best one in my opinion - I'll keep it anonymous, but it meant so much to me when I read this.
"I think the world of you, and always have. You are one of the most thoughtful individuals I have ever known. And I know that when individuals come to the conclusions that you have come to, there is a tenable fear of how friends and family will react.  In the immortal words of Dolly Parton, I will always love you for who you are and what you have meant to me.  If your path, whatever it is, gives you a closer connection to your savior and God, then take the path. Be happy and continue searching for what gives you peace and happiness. I love you."


The church is broad enough to accommodate divergent beliefs
I somewhat agree with this.  As long as a person goes through the outward motions and keeps controversial things (i.e. the immoral issues) to themselves and doesn't loudly talk about them, then yes, the church can accommodate you.  But this is how a person loses their integrity.  Integrity means the inward and the outward are the same.  One loses integrity when they "go through the motions" but are in pain and suffering on the inside; when their heart doesn't really believe what they are expected to say or expected to act.

We spoke to two leaders about our situation.  Both of them thanked us for not speaking openly about these topics.  If you can't speak your mind and share your heart in your church, then you're suffering in silence.  I kept all this in for a long time and it hurt me mentally.  It builds up in the dark; and depression, anxiety and fear creep in.  You begin to think you are broken and worthless.  I have learned so many people, in the church, have suffered many forms of mental illness.  I can't help but wonder, judging by my own experience, that some of the dogma and culture in the church causes mental illness.  And the fact that we can't talk about all these elephants in the room is sad.

That's all for now.  I will probably add to this list as time goes on.

By and large, reactions from loved ones have been positive and supportive - very Christ-like!